Fate Comes Knocking

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Fate Comes Knocking

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Posted: 6/30/2011
Note: Names, Identifying informaiton and details may have been altered to protect personal identities.

My name is Mark. Like many adoptees, I have grown up wondering about my birth family. I was raised in a loving home by wonderful parents who said they understood that I might someday need to seek out my birth parents. But I was born in 1952 and placed in a conservative family, I rarely broached the subject of reuniting with my birth parents. Whenever I brought it up, I could feel the tension in their shoulders and see the disapproval written all over their faces. Then again, they had good reason to feel threatened by my desire to search.

One day when I was about a year old, my adoptive mother was home alone with me and the doorbell rang. My birth parents had shown up out of the blue, a total shock. They appeared to be a happy young couple in their early twenties and introduced themselves as Elaine Mae and Jack Blythe. They were newlyweds and had driven across the state to visit my adoptive parents. However, they didn't just want to see how I was doing. They explained that they had recently gotten married and begged my adoptive parents to give me back so I could grow up with my "real" parents and siblings. I can only imagine the fear and anxiety my adoptive mother felt when confronted with her worst nightmare. Years later when I discussed my desire to find my birth parents, it must have seemed like they were reliving that day over again. I love my adoptive parents and I'm grateful for everything they have done for me. But I also need to know my heritage, medical information, and whether my birth parents are still alive.

Clearly, my adoptive parents didn't just "give me back." However, they did write down some important information about my birth parents, which later was the key to solving my case. They wrote down my birth parents' full names and dates of birth, and the fact that they were married in 1948, one year after my birth.

Over the years I occasionally looked in phone books or on the internet for Elaine and Jack Blythe. I never went so far as to hire a professional or take a more aggressive approach. I thought if fate wanted us together, it would happen on its own. I also held back out of respect for my adoptive parents.
It wasn't until late April, 2010 that I decided I was tired of waiting, and it was time to search once and for all, for better or for worse. I asked myself, what if I have full siblings out there somewhere? What if I wait too long and miss out on the chance to know my birth parents? Don't my children deserve to know their medical history and heritage? I contacted SQA and two weeks later, Julie Jones had solved my case!

Unfortunately, Elaine passed away in 1983 and Jack soon followed in 1986. However, Julie discovered that they had several children, including Jack Jr., Elaine Jr., and 4 more boys and 4 more girls after me! I had hoped for siblings, but never imagined I would have TEN of them! Even better, my birth parents were very open with their children about me, and they always knew they had a big brother out there somewhere. Our parents always promised them that one day I would show up on their doorstep the same way they had once shown up on mine. When Julie made the first phone call, the news that I had "finally" found them spread like wildfire, and before I knew it my phone was ringing off the hook with siblings, cousins, nieces and nephews who can't wait to meet me. It has only been two weeks since that day, and I am still processing all the information. I regret that my birth parents have passed away, but I knew that was a possibility when I started the search. I am grateful that I have been welcomed with such open arms and that finally, the mystery is solved. Thanks to everyone at SQA for your efficient search program, and to Julie for your no-nonsense "get it done" philosophy that wrapped my case up so quickly. I will keep you all posted as I meet my siblings in person and in the process, get to know my birth parents vicariously. God bless you all!

(Written by Mica Burton on Mark's behalf.)

Client ID# 276579
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