Words Are Not Enough

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Words Are Not Enough

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Posted: 9/23/2009
Note: Names, Identifying informaiton and details may have been altered to protect personal identities.

My son's birthday is April 15th and I have celebrated and mourned that day for the last 48 years. I held my child in my arms only once, and have imagined him growing up over the years, even without knowing his name. Can you imagine celebrating the birthday of a child you have not held since the day he was born? I have both celebrated his life and mourned the fact that I have not been able to be a part of it. For years I have punished myself for my decision to put him up for adoption. I have feared the worst--that he has had an unhappy life or died as a child, or harbors years of resentment towards me. As the years have gone by the desire to reunite with my son has become stronger and stronger. This year on his birthday I decided to give myself a gift--the gift of finally knowing what happened to my son, and whether or not I made the right decision that day in 1961.

I contacted Search Quest America for the first time on July 29, 2009. My case was assigned to Susan, SQA CEO and lead investigator. She called me back the same day to tell me that she had learned my sons identity. His name today is Michael! Within a few weeks, Susan found his current address in San Diego and a telephone number where he could be reached. I asked Susan to make the first contact for me, and held my breath as she left messages on his machine. I was on edge for days, and slowly my excitement turned to disappointment when he failed to return the phone call. I cried my heart out, and finally accepted the fact that Michael must not want to reunite with me.

Susan did not give up so easily. She encouraged me to write Michael a letter, and I followed her advice. Susan instructed me to wait at least 10 days, and then follow up with a phone call. The month of August passed agonizingly slow, and still I received no response from Michael. I decided not to call him, but tried to develop patience and respect for his wishes.

Yesterday afternoon out of the blue I received the phone call I have been waiting for. Michael started by saying "I think I am the son you have been searching for for 48 years." Over an hour later we finally hung up. Of course I had told my children and ex about writing to him, so I notified them. Today, Sunday, I am still trying to take it in. I felt so bold in taking the first step to ask for help, then to find him and write a letter was more difficult than anything I had had to do for a long, long time. I just gave him time to reply and he finally did. He works out of town and his mail was just stacked up for him. He picked it up and my letter fell out. He said that he had not cried as he did then since he was little. Of course we exchanged phone numbers and e-mail addresses. My sons are going to write and send pictures. A mere thank you is not enough I know, but it is the best I can do. Susan and Search Quest America, I will not hesitate to refer you to others if they need services such as yours. This was certainly the right time to pursue this quest. Thank you for all you did. Much love, Kate.

(Written by Mica Burton on Kate's behalf.)

Client ID# 251142
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